I’m sure you’ve heard the expression “life begins outside of your comfort zone”.
Well it’s true!
Recently I heard from Shelly, a woman who had completed my DTL Jumpstart Your Love Life 7 Day Challenge. She was so excited when she said “wow I can’t believe that this flirting thing really works”!
When I asked her about it, she told me a story about how she went out dancing with a group of coworkers and she saw this guy she thought was attractive. She said they had so much fun exchanging flirty smiles and making eye contact all night. She said he was so cute and it had been so long since she saw a guy she found so attractive. She also said she had a great time that night, dancing, laughing and having fun.
So how did it turn out with the cute guy? Apparently nothing! He ended up leaving while she was dancing with her friends.
So what happened?
Have you ever met a guy totally unexpectedly, had a great conversation and seemed to really connect. Then at the end, there was a brief, kind of awkward pause and you said goodbye and walked away.
Later looking back you could not help wondering- what if?
What if I would have given him my card?
What if he was “The One”?
Did I blow it?
Well the good news is- you didn’t blow it. As Kathryn Alice says, you can’t blow it with your soul mate but you can delay it.
What do you do so that next time this comes up you are ready?
Well, let’s take Shelly’s story for example. Here is a simple truth. No matter how confident a man is, very few men will approach a woman in a group. If Shelly would have “cut loose from the herd” for a few minutes and made herself available to that cute guy she was flirting with, who knows what would have happened?
When I asked her why she didn’t do that, she admitted it just made her feel uncomfortable. It was so much easier to smile at a distance, safely surrounded by her crowd of friends.
So you see, there is a reason that the Day 7 Advanced Challenge is to go somewhere by yourself.
The key for attracting anything into your life- love, money, career, whatever, is that you have to step out of your comfort zone.
So guess what else happened to Shelly? Well she decided to attend a weekend workshop by herself. As she stood looking at the long lines trying to figure out where to sign in guess who appeared out of nowhere? A handsome doctor saying “you look lost” and proceeded to help her get registered and took her under his wing for the rest of the weekend!
So take a moment to ask yourself- how are you playing it safe?
Where in your life and love life are you hiding cozily away in your comfort zone?
If you are ready to stop hiding and get out there here is how!
Your intuition is the key!
What is that one thing that keeps coming to your attention but you keep pushing it away or putting it off? The thing you have a million reasons not to do, like you are too busy or you don’t have the money or you will do it next month or next year or after you lose 10 pounds?
Is it to take dancing lessons or attend a hike with your local meet-up group? Maybe it is to take a ski trip- after all winter is here!
Whatever that thing is, that is your next step.
And next time you meet someone and have a great conversation- offer your business card! What is the worst that can happen? So far I have never heard of someone refusing a business card, tearing it up in front of you or walking away in disdain.
So give it a try, stretch yourself a little, follow your instincts- I promise you won’t be disappointed!