Is it hard to let go of a relationship when it’s not working because you’re afraid you won’t meet another man you’re so attracted to?
You met him. The guy who seemed to have everything you have been looking for. You are pretty sure that finally you have met “The One”. You had tons of things in common. The chemistry was there. You enjoyed each other’s company. You were ready!
So what happened?
Maybe he stopped calling or returning your calls and never seemed to want to make plans. The relationship just faded away or worse he told you he was not interested in a “serious relationship”.You were left thinking- what did I do wrong? Did I blow my chances for love? Maybe you became intimate too soon. It had been so long since you felt chemistry like that and it felt so good so why not? Maybe you called him too much. Just in case he was afraid you did not want to talk to him, or you were not sure if he really knew you were interested. Maybe you felt insecure so you talked about other guys or tried to prove how independent you were by picking up the check or impressing him with your career success.
Whatever it was, you really liked him and when the chips landed and the relationship was over, it felt AWFUL!
Karen was in love with Dave. They got to know each other through a volunteer organization. They shared the same values, enjoyed the same activities and she was so attracted to him. They had two dates and the chemistry was crazy! But he told her that he was absolutely NOT interested in a serious relationship. He felt like she wanted a Prince Charming and he would only let her down. Karen came to me distraught because she really liked him but somehow she had scared him away. We found that she suffered from the same fatal disease that many women suffer – the Imaginary Relationship Disease.
When you are ready to commit and you meet a guy you really like – finally- it is very easy to jump way ahead too soon.
Your mind gets carried away and you fantasize about your life together, already living happily ever after before the relationship even starts! You start to look at travel magazines for your summer vacation. You may even peruse wedding magazines.
Stop!
The most important thing you can do for yourself and your relationship is to stay present. No matter how great he may seem, you don’t know him. Plus men can sense an Imaginary Relationship a mile away. And it scares them! So stay present, take your time. Wear a rubber band around your wrist and if your mind starts to wander to the future, snap it! You are not in a committed relationship until you BOTH agree verbally that you are.
Remember good women are hard to find too!
Never forget that you are a great catch and absolutely worthy of having a wonderful man. When you know your value and have this mindset all you will attract are good men. Take your time and be selective! Then it is guaranteed that your Great Man, your True Love, is going to love and appreciate you!